The Chase
All my life I have been busy pursuing preset goals, and honestly, most of them were set by this convoluted society we live in. Excelling in academics was always mandatory, everyone's top priority. Goofing up would brand one a social stigma by default.
All you had to do was earn the privilege of predicates like outstanding all-rounder, athlete, singer, orator and you'd find a little halo on your head, making you the apple of your daddy's eye and a social role model. Needless to say, I chose that path and devoted my entire childhood to a single-minded pursuit of such goals.
As I now recall, success often knocked at my door but instead of embracing it, I stayed more fixated on my ill-fated efforts and relinquished targets. I guess that's what human behavior is all about.
From kindergarten to the workplace, it has been a never-ending journey. The goals kept changing, and I kept chasing.
October Blues
It was in October of 2010 when I met with an accident, and my indefatigable chase came to a standstill. For once, I felt there is more to life than just pursuing boundless materialistic goals. I had the time to think about my life as a whole.
Back then, life did look a little biased and unfair, but I suppose it gets to you when you spend a couple of months on a hospital bed. Those five months of recovery, stretching from late 2010 into 2011, gave me more clarity than the years of chasing ever did. Thankfully, the worst of it did not last long, and I don't feel that way anymore. What matters most now is my connection with myself, being present, feeling blissful.
Thanks to my October blues, I developed an insatiable hunger to learn more about life, faith, and karma.
One hard fall and I realize, it is not the length of life, but the depth of life.
The Questions
Being idle for five long months, I was compelled to analyze, evaluate, appreciate, and question various aspects of life. This habit of constantly thinking kept me away from sulking and self-pity, and in the long run, turned out to be one hell of a time killer.
By the end of those five months, I was full of questions. A few that still remain unanswered:
Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first?
What is our purpose of existence?
Why are you, you?
Why isn't there any guide to living a perfect life?
Tranquilizing After Hours
Waking up early had always been a problem since childhood. Being a Sikh by religion and an army officer's son, I was constantly reminded about the sanctity of early hours. I tried, but seldom succeeded.
Instead, I developed a fond liking for the after hours. There was something soothing about them, a strange atmospheric effect, an aura perfect for introspection and finding solace. All I had to do was dream with my eyes open. Thanks to those thought-provoking nights, I evolved into a better human being.
And all my questions were answered using just three words.
Faith. Karma. Acceptance.
New Found Religion
What I came to learn with time is that the very reason for our existence is our karma, it acts like a link in a never-ending cycle. Everything from our birth to our heavenly abode is governed by it. I truly believe there is a lot of unexplained stuff out there waiting to be toyed with, but we refrain from doing so. Ignorant of karma, we blindly lean on delusive beliefs like fate and luck. It is rather amusing to see a man winning a lottery applauding his luck, while a man caught stealing blames it.
For those who don't believe in karma or the supernatural, faith happens to be the religion. And faith exists in the heart of every living being by default, our subconscious mind is driven by it.
Every night we go to bed setting an alarm for the next day. That is nothing but an act of faith. Unaware of what tomorrow holds, we comfortably enjoy a pleasant present. That too, is nothing but an act of faith.
Life is nothing but a fiddle, and faith happens to be the bow.
My journey still goes on, and I intend to make the most of it. I am glad I rediscovered myself.
Honest Karma. True Faith. Power of Acceptance.